What Admitting Feelings Can Lead To
by angeldream
Summary: My attempt to write a C/7 story, my first fanfic so please be gentle and please review, I need all the advice I can get. Chapter 3 is up. B'Elanna & Captain Janeway learn about Chakotay & Seven. Read to find out how they take the news!
1. Default Chapter

Category: Star Trek Voyager - C/7  
  
Rating: PG-13 for later chapters.  
  
Disclaimer: Star Trek: Voyager and all things contained therein are the property of Paramount and Viacom. I will receive no profit from this story.  
  
Title: What Admitting Feelings Can Lead To.  
  
By: Angeldream  
  
Author note: When 'Endgame' was released I was amazed, yes the idea of Chakotay & Seven together wasn't completely out of the blue thanks to 'Human Error', but for them to already be on their 3rd date was (frankly) annoying, where was the confession of feelings, the 1st date, the romance. Well if Paramount wasn't going satisfy my curiosity then I would have to do it my self and this is it. This story is set after the episodes 'Human Error' and 'Natural Law' and although I'm writing it after watching the 'Endgame' episode, I will completely ignore it and any reference to anything learnt in that episode is a complete accident.  
  
Chapter 1 - The Ventu Waterfall Program.  
  
At 1800 hours Seven of Nines' duty shift was over and as she was about to leave Astrometrics the doors opened to reveal Commander Chakotay.  
  
"Do you need something Commander?"  
  
"Yes, I was hoping you could join me on holodeck 2 at 2000 hours, I've designed a holo-program that I'd like your opinion on."  
  
Seven was uncertain as to why he would want her opinion on it, "I am not familiar with holo-program design, Lieutenant Paris would be a more suitable person to ask."  
  
"It's not the technicalities that I need help with, it's the aesthetics, I need you to tell me if I've got the colours and positions of everything right."  
  
"I am still uncertain as to why you would need my help Commander but I will comply."  
  
"Thank you Seven, I'll see you at 2000 hours." Commander Chakotay turned around and left the Astrometrics Lab.  
  
Seven was left feeling unsure of what she should do now, being in the Commanders company was dangerous for her, she had feelings for him, ones that she couldn't control but ones that could control her, even kill her if she wasn't careful, therefore she would have to be careful.  
  
Seven left Astrometrics and to went to Cargo Bay 2 where her regeneration alcove was operational, she checked the last diagnostic the computer had run on her alcove to make sure it was operating as normal. She then programmed the alcove for a one hour regeneration cycle to help calm her mind and to sort through and save the days relevant data to a borg data node. She stood on the platform, the alcove connected the subcutaneous wires on Sevens' back to the power conduits in the alcove, she then felt her primary cortical node tingle as it was connected, her eyes closed and her mind floated.  
  
The alcove beeped, Sevens' eyes opened and she stepped off the platform. *Regeneration cycle is complete* stated the computer. She tapped her combadge and said "Seven of Nine addition to daily log, at 2000 hours I will be viewing Commander Chakotays' new holo-program as he has requested my opinion on it. As for the emotional aspect, I will instruct the Doctor to monitor my vital signs and should I become at risk he will transport me to sickbay and stabilise my cortical node. After the viewing I shall eat, as I will require nutritional supplements by then. End Log."  
  
At the door of holodeck 2 Commander Chakotay ordered the computer to run his program.  
  
"Seven I want you to do something for me."  
  
"I am already doing something for you Commander, am I not?"  
  
"True, alright something else for me."  
  
"Which is?"  
  
"I'd like you to close your eyes."  
  
"Why?"  
  
"Because I want to surprise you."  
  
Seven took a deep breath, she was feeling the emotion of anticipation, it was an unfamiliar sensation which she needed to control, she took another deep breath and gave her answer "I will comply."  
  
She closed her eyes, Commander Chakotay placed his arms around her to guide her, it was a curious sensation, what humans call 'goose bumps' she believed, but also a feeling of safety, of the belief that he wouldn't hurt her, curious she would have to analyse the feeling later. The door to the holodeck opened and they walked in.  
  
Seven could hear the sound of water rushing, falling, of a breeze rustling leaves, and birds singing, calling to each other, she could hear the sound of their feet moving over soil, crunching on dead leaves. The smell was unique; she couldn't place it, which was unusual for her. It was as if closing her eyes had increased the abilities of her other senses and they were being overwhelmed, she took a few more deep breaths. Commander Chakotay guided her to the spot where he wanted her to open her eyes, so that she would see that view first.  
  
"Open your eyes now."  
  
The waterfall, she was facing the Ventu waterfall, she looked around, the rock where she had sat and watched with the little Ventu girl, the flowers, the plants, everything was as she remembered.  
  
"From your expression, I'm going to assume that I've got the aesthetics just right."  
  
"Your assumption is correct. Your attention to every detail is incredible, but I don't understand how you reproduced it, I lost my tricorder under a bush before my guide reached me and, until you came the next morning, I had no way of recording any data. You came with your guides while I was at the deflector debris and I'm sure you would have mentioned the waterfall had you seen it."  
  
"That's true. Do you remember how worried you were about the Ledosians having time to scan the planet and the deflecter modifications and be able to reproduce the technology in time?"  
  
"Yes, and I still am, why?"  
  
"Well, you don't have to worry about the Ledosian expeditions' scans anymore, because their tricorders were left behind when Tom beamed them to the Delta Flyer, Tom then beamed them to the aft compartment before he destroyed the deflector dish."  
  
"How did you know that Lieutenant Paris had them?"  
  
"The Ledosians complained that they had been left on the planet and in their last transmission they demanded that we reopen the barrier so that they could retrieve their contaminating technology for the Ventu's sake. Not so they could take advantage of the new resources that would become available to them or to destroy the Ventus' way of life. So the Captain asked me to check before we did anything, I did, Tom gave me the tricorders and the Captain told the Ledosians that, because of the Prime Directive, we couldn't interfere in local Ledosian matters nor could we do anything that might affect a pre-warp culture. As we're out of Ledosian space and we haven't heard anything more from them I'm guessing that they'll keep trying to remove the barrier but it will remain a fruitless exercise."  
  
"I hope so, as I believe it would be a shame to damage their unique way of life and I know that introducing the Ventu to the Ledosians would do that."  
  
"There's nothing we can do now, we couldn't stay and guard their planet forever, we just have to remember that the Ledosians couldn't get to the Ventu before we arrived and it's doubtful if they could find a way now we've gone."  
  
"That is correct." Seven felt reassured, at times she felt the emotion of guilt, if she hadn't wanted to go to the conference on Ledosia Prime to study warp mechanics they wouldn't have been anywhere near the Ventu preserve to damage the barrier in the first place.  
  
"Now that your fears have been put to rest, would you like to explore see what beauty spots we missed or would you like to stay here and watch the water fall some more?"  
  
"I'd like to stay here, for some reason I find this place relaxing."  
  
"No, I find water relaxing as well. I have something to confess."  
  
Seven felt her heart skip a beat, what if he had found out that she had used a hologram of him on the holodeck, yes she had deleted the program but it was still something that she shouldn't have done. She heard the Borg metronome sound grow louder, it beat in time to her own heartbeat and she knew she had to slow it or risk the Doctor transporting her to sickbay. She practised the Vulcan breathing exercise that Tuvok had taught her two weeks before, and the Borg metronome grew silent.  
  
"I removed your Ventu blanket from the Cargo Bay in the hope that you would want to stay, we can spread it out over there, sit on it and talk."  
  
"That is acceptable, and I forgive you for your transgression." Seven smiled and Chakotay knew that she was again attempting to diffuse tension with a joke as the Doctor had taught her.  
  
Once seated Chakotay turned to face Seven "I have something else to confess." When she was facing him he continued, "I have feelings for you Seven, romantic feelings, the time I spent with you on the Ventu preserve made me realise them. You have amazing depths of strength and courage, which you've shown in the way you fought emotionally to reclaim your humanity and individuality, which you've done, and yet you keep striving to discover more and you've taught those lucky enough to be around you to do the same. You're a very loyal person and you would never willingly betray anyone, you've got a natural sense of humour that I find enchanting and your intelligent and I find you beautiful. In short Seven I think I've fallen in love with you. I need to know though, if you think it's possible, if in time, you will be able to feel the same way about me?"  
  
Sevens' Borg metronome was again beating and she could hear a buzzing sound as well, she knew she didn't have long before the doctor would transport her. She took a deep breath to try to delay that moment because she desperately needed to tell the Commander how she felt about him, it was a compulsion she could not, would not, deny. "You have been honest with me and I owe you nothing less in return, Commander, I find it hard to discuss, even to understand, my emotions but I will try. When I became truly aware of Unimatrix Zero I learnt of a six-year relationship that I'd had with Axum and while I was there my feelings for him returned. As I was not connected to the hive-mind when I left Unimatrix zero my feelings remained and left me feeling incomplete. I tried to recreate those feelings on the holodeck by participating in a number of social occasions but it didn't work. However those feelings of completeness have returned, they occur when I am with you, along with other physical indications that indicate that I experience an emotional response to you. I believe that I love you but I am uncertain as to how I should act with regard to this knowledge."  
  
Chakotay reached out with his hand and stroked Sevens cheek, his touch was like satin and her skin tingled pleasurably. Then the buzzing advanced into a sharp pain, which she was able to hide from Chakotay, she knew that she must finish this conversation quickly. "There is more Commander. In my primary cortical node is a fail-safe device, it was designed to shut down my higher brain functions when I achieve certain levels of emotion stimulation and deactivate me. The Doctor has designed a surgery procedure that could deactivate the fail-safe device, but if my primary cortical node were to be damaged I would die. I am incapable of surviving without it, as the only Borg implants that remain in me are vital and the primary cortical node regulates them. I needed to tell you this because my feelings have activated the fail-safe and very soon the Doctor will be transporting me to sickbay."  
  
Chakotay took hold of Sevens hand, then moved so that he could put both his arms around her and hold her. "Seven I don't understand, you've felt stronger emotions before, when your link was first severed from the collective mind you were both terrified and furious, pretty strong emotions, so why is your cortical node reacting now?"  
  
Seven relaxed into Chakotays hold, she felt safe, almost as though nothing could happen to harm her, and she wished she could spend eternity just like this. She winced with the next spasm of pain, she had to hurry, the pain was getting stronger. "My primary cortical node was once Ichebs' so it's a later design than my old one, it has the fail-safe incorporated in it, mine didn't. As Icheb had been a Borg for such a short period of time he's able to survive with out his Borg implants, I cannot survive without mine."  
  
Chakotay felt her wince in pain. "Should I call for a transport to sickbay now?" He asked, clearly worried about her.  
  
Seven tried to bury herself further into his arms. "No, I want to stay with you, like this for as long as I can. Please don't worry, the Doctor has ordered the computer to monitor my vital signs and the minute I become at risk he will transport me himself he will stabilise my primary cortical node and I will be fine again."  
  
"You asked the Doctor to monitor you so you must have known this was a possibility, so why did you agree to view this program?"  
  
Seven knew that, once again, she needed to answer honestly. "Because I wanted to spend time with you, because I have found that time spent with you is worth this happening. Because I love you." The view of the waterfall was starting to spin. "Chakotay . . . ." She started to warn him but the familiar whine of the transporter stopped her and they started to dematerialise.  
  
TBC. 


	2. Chapter 2 In Sickbay

Author Note: Sevens quote comes from Star Trek Voyager Human Error. I had a friend look at the drugs and their amounts and I am very grateful to her, however she is training to be a doctor and not one yet, even so all mistakes are mine. I want to thank all reviewers for their reviews and I took Brenda Shaffer- Shirings advise and got myself a beta reader but I still take responsibility for all grammatical mistakes, well me and Microsoft Word. I want to apologise for taking so long to write this chapter hopefully the next one will flow faster.  
  
Chapter 2 - In Sickbay.  
  
When they rematerialised on the floor of sickbay Seven was unconscious; the Doctor quickly took her from Chakotays' arms and placed her on the biobed. He started to scan her with a medical tricorder. Chakotay quickly stood up and went to the foot of the biobed, he knew he didn't want to miss a second and that he wanted to be the first person she saw when she woke up. Seven had told him that she would be fine and although he trusted her he also knew that things could go very wrong very quickly when in sickbay.  
  
The doors slid open and Lieutenant Paris ran in, he took a second to observe the scene in front of him, and said, "Where do you want me Doc?"  
  
Before he could reply the medical tricorder and the monitor scanning Sevens biomedical status started to beep furiously as Sevens body jerked up and down in a seizure "Give her 50mg of Chlormethiazole while I set up the computer to take over from Sevens cortical node."  
  
"Got it." From this Paris knew that what ever was wrong with Seven could be deadly. He grabbed a hypospray, pressed the buttons to give him the correct dose and pressed it against Sevens neck; heard the hiss and knew the medicine had been delivered. "Done." Seven stopped jerking and for a few seconds the scanners beeped in a rhythmic fashion before starting again. Paris looked at the monitor "She's going into anaphylaxis shock."  
  
"Give her 0.5 Epinephrine and 30mg Chlorpheniramine. Computer give us a 20 second countdown on my mark." His fingers danced on the padd. "Mark" The computer started counting backwards "20.19.18".  
  
Chakotay realised this could end in disaster for Seven and his fear grew until it could be called terror and he felt its icy hand placed around his heart. He closed his eyes. This wasn't how he'd planned the evening to go, granted he'd run a couple of scenarios in his head which ended with Seven telling him that she didn't feel anything for him but that had been the worst thing he could envisage happening. The best would have been Seven returning his love, them sharing a few kisses, watching the sun set and talking about where they would go from there. But seeing her come this close to death hadn't been anywhere in the picture. His heart was telling him that at least he'd told her how he felt, that if she did die he wouldn't have regrets about that, but he also knew that he did not want her to die and he started to pray. To the Spirits, to his father, frankly to anyone who would listen and might help her.  
  
"14.13.12".  
  
When Chakotay looked again the Doctor was pointing a medical instrument towards Sevens neck, "Apply 20 milojules neuro-static pulse on my mark." This time Paris worked on a padd. "Now". A flash of red light seemed to enter Seven and she jerked again, the monitor continued to beep erratically.  
  
"9.8.7".  
  
"Again", but there was no change. "Increase charge to 30". Paris nodded and Seven jerked. However, this time there was a difference, the beeping slowed into a regular rhythm.  
  
"4.3.2".  
  
"Computer transfer Sevens functions back to her cortical node!" The Doctor shouted.  
  
The computer beeped "Transfer complete".  
  
The Doctor looked at the screen showing the readout of Sevens biomedical status and announced "Her vital signs are returning to normal" and he smiled.  
  
Paris let out a huge sigh of relief and Chakotay felt his muscles start to relax "Oh thank you" he whispered. Paris remembered that he was still in the room, but why was he here? That was the question, another good question was what had they been doing for Seven to get so close to dying? He examined the look on Chakotays' face, it showed many emotions, and some of them he'd never seen on the Commanders face before. Then it hit him. Chakotay had fallen in love with Seven. he really hadn't seen that one coming. and no one else had either, the entire crew believed that Captain Janeway and the Commander would get together one of these days, that theirs was a love of mythical proportions. Paris could foresee problems ahead, the crew tolerated Seven but that was it and seeing her and Chakotay together was going to take some getting used to. Paris felt a chill go up his spine as he thought of them.together and he shivered, he needed to talk to B'Elanna and fast but how to leave?  
  
The Doctor started to scan Seven using a medical tricorder, he ran it over Sevens head a number of times as Chakotay and Paris held their breath, they knew he was looking for any neurological damage, which was a real possibility. "And there seems to be no damage to Sevens cortical array, her cortical node is stable, all pathways are normal and there are no signs of anomalous chemical readings. Everything seems fine."  
  
"That's great news Doc," said Paris relieved, he wasn't needed any longer; this meant he could leave; he knew he would have to lie to get out of there but frankly that was something he was very good at and so he took his best shot: "The Captain said that when I was done participating in the medical emergency that I was head straight back to the bridge as we were about to enter the nebula and apparently she wants the best pilot at the helm". The Doctor nodded and he left sickbay. Chakotay and Seven, this would be something that wouldn't please her but he had to tell B'Elanna. Maybe she could talk some sense into Chakotay, make him see that him and Seven might not be the greatest love match.  
  
Chakotay walked up to the biobed smoothed Sevens damp hair away from her forehead and kisses it, he felt the silky smoothness of her skin and his lips tingle, there first kiss and she's unconscious and misses it. The Doctor coughed and Chakotay lifted his head "Yes Doctor?"  
  
"From that kiss and the fact that you were transported in with Seven I'm going to assume that you know about her fail-safe device". Chakotay nodded his head. "Then we need to talk because frankly I need an ally." The Doctor headed towards his office and Chakotay followed him.  
  
Chakotay and the Doctor sat in the Doctors office "Commander I need you to tell me what you know so that I can fill in the blanks."  
  
Chakotay didn't understand "Doctor I'm not family even though I love her. " The Doctor felt a pang from his emotional subroutines and for a brief second wished they weren't quite so advanced as he felt the hope he had held that maybe Seven could see him in the same way die. He did what he was trained to do though and became the professional he was. "So doesn't anything you tell me violate Doctor patient privileges?"  
  
"Not in this case, Seven has clearly told you about it and now that it has become life threatening I can either tell you, in your capacity as Commander, or Captain Janeway, which Seven requested me not to do."  
  
"She doesn't know?" Chakotay asked amazed that Seven hadn't confided in the Captain, who she considered a friend and trusted advisor, but she had in him, he felt honoured. Then slightly disloyal that he knew something about Seven that the Captain didn't, he looked into his heart and knew that if Seven didn't want the Captain to learn about the fail-safe device then she wouldn't learn about it from him.  
  
"No she doesn't. I believe that Seven felt that Captain Janeway would try to convince her to have the surgery to try to disable the fail-safe device and Seven didn't want that. So I respected her wished but if we cannot convince Seven to have the surgery then I will have to tell her and I don't want to do that."  
  
"Seven gave me the impression that you'd both decided the surgery was to dangerous as the fail-safe device is either on, or in, her cortical node and that if anything went wrong, if it were damaged in any way, she would die. Isn't that true?"  
  
"Not exactly.the risks of damaging the cortical node and the fact that Seven would most likely die is correct as her cortical node regulates her vital implants, but I believed that it was worth the risk but Seven refused to discuss it."  
  
"Do you know why she refused to consider it?" The Doctor hesitated. "Doctor if I'm going to help you convince her to have the surgery I'm going to have to know why she doesn't want it."  
  
"I'm afraid I don't know for certain, we first learnt of the device when Voyager was in the alien munitions sector and she was absent from Astrometrics during a duty shift." Chakotay nodded. "When it was all over she told me and I quote 'the fail-safe device will ensure that I am no longer distracted,' end quote. I believe that the emotions she had felt and her body's violent reaction to those feelings scared her. Therefore, she used the device as a way to hide from her feelings and as a perfect reason to avoid them from that moment on. However this is pure speculation as she has refused to discuss it ever since."  
  
"Understood." Chakotay was starting to think he understood her motivation, Seven had once said that Voyager was her collective now but when she was on the holodeck, doing something she would see as selfish and frivolous, she had put it in jeopardy so she felt guilty. However, there would have to be more to it than that as Seven was infinitely complex, he decided to put that aside and concentrate on discovering more from the Doctor. "There's still one thing I don't understand. Seven told me that you would be able to stabilise her cortical node and that she would be fine, and she was right, but she acted as though it wasn't life threatening, why did she come so very close to dying if it wasn't life threatening before?"  
  
"Seven acted like that because the fail-safe trying to shut down her cortical node didn't cause anywhere near as serious a reaction last time. I believe that the more times it attempts to deactivate her the more severe the reactions will get. If I am correct then it is highly unlikely I will be able to prevent her from dying if it happens again."  
  
Chakotay felt fears cold hand sneak around his heart again, he slowly released his breath in a sigh, all of a sudden he felt drained of energy, he needed time to come to terms with all this but he didn't want to leave Seven. "Doctor do you mind if I stay with Seven?"  
  
"For how long?"  
  
"Truthfully? Until she tells me to go."  
  
"As I don't believe telling you to go and rest in your quarters would enable you to actually get some rest. I will allow you to stay in sickbay so long as you agree to the following conditions: that you allow me to give you a light sedative that will relax you, that you lay on a biobed and that you agree to go off duty for the next 24 hours on medical grounds." The Doctor forestalled Chakotays inevitable protests by adding "I will wake you when Seven shows signs of waking; your body and mind will get the opportunity to do some necessary healing and you will be able to stay with her for longer than if you do your duty shift."  
  
Chakotay knew he would have agreed to any terms so long as he got to stay with Seven and as he was being honest with himself he also knew that the Doctors terms were actually good suggestions. "I agree to your terms Doctor but I wouldn't want to face you over a negotiation table." The Doctor allowed himself a slight smirk as Chakotay left the office and went back to Sevens side, he took her hand and whispered "I'm still here sweetheart and I'm not going anywhere until I see you open your eyes and hear your voice and know for certain that you're going to be alright I promise." He kissed her forehead again then released her hand. He laid down on the biobed next to Sevens turned onto his side so that he could see her and said "Okay Doc I'm all yours." He felt the hypospray touch his neck, heard the hiss of the medicine and drifted off to sleep. 


	3. Chapter 3 Friends

A/N. Thank you to everyone who reviewed, you feed my muse & I appreciate a  
  
great deal. Once again I had a friend look at the drug and I am very grateful to her, however she is still training to be a doctor and not one yet, even so all mistakes are mine. Also a great big Thank You to my beta reader & I'm still blaming any mistakes on Microsoft Word & myself.  
  
Chapter 3 - Friends.  
  
Chakotay awoke in sickbay, he blinked furiously & tried to sit up, a low moan echoed when he finally managed it, he couldn't believe that anyone could be so stiff. Then memories flooded back: The fact that he had told Seven he loved her; the wonder he'd felt when she told him that she loved him as well; her collapse; the fear he felt when he realised she might die; the relief that she would survive with no neurological damage & the knowledge that it will probably happen again. He needed to see her, to make sure she was still there, still alive.  
  
Ignoring the pain he turned his upper body towards the diagnostic bed, and breathed a sigh of relief, he could hear the steady, reassuring beep of the monitor scanning Sevens biomedical status. She was asleep, her face was childlike, innocent, & he knew he could stare at her forever, it was as though the sight of her was something that was now as vital to him as oxygen.  
  
"Your awake. I was beginning to think there might be something wrong with my programme & I might have overmedicated you by mistake."  
  
Chakotay was confused by The Doctors greeting but had to put need for knowledge first "Is Seven still alright?"  
  
"Her vital signs have been stable for 26 hours, & although she is unconscious I've given her a high does of Chlordiazepoxide so that she won't feel any emotions if she dreams. She'll need to carry on with the treatment until she has the surgery, but that will have to be soon, as I estimate that she'll have a week, maybe even less, before her body starts to compensate & the drugs become less effective. Right now though she needs to regenerate for 4 hours so that corrections can be made to her cortical subprocessor. But first, how do you feel?"  
  
"Like I've been drinking way too much Romulan ale, very stiff, & feeling like I need some caffeine to kick my brain into gear, but other than that just fine."  
  
"I'm not surprised, as you've been asleep for 25 & a half hours, you're probably mildly suffering from caffeine withdrawal, dehydration & your electrolytes will certainly need balancing with a light breakfast. Which should come from the replicator & not from Mr Neelix. I would recommend scrambled eggs & toast. And then you can go & see the Captain as she is most anxious to speak with you, so anxious that she threatened to delete my programme if you didn't report to her as soon as you were medically fit to do so."  
  
Chakotay groaned inwardly, clearly 'most anxious' was an understatement. "You'll call me when Seven's showing signs of waking?"  
  
"Of course Commander."  
  
Chakotay walked over to Seven & whispered in her ear "Don't worry sweetheart, I'll be back before you wake up." He kissed her forehead & again felt his lips tingle, he was starting to get the impression that he would always feel that whenever he kissed Seven & that prospect was a pleasing one, he stood back from the biobed.  
  
The Doctor held Sevens' hand & said "Sickbay to Transporter Room, 2 to beam to Cargo Bay 2. Energise."  
  
Chakotay watched as the transporter beam dematerialised Seven and The Doctor, then he headed for the door, he would go to the Mess Hall but first he needed a sonic shower & a change of uniform.  
  
"Eating alone?" Chakotay looked up to see B'Elanna Torres standing next to the table, he glanced at her face, knew that Tom had shared the news that he had been with Seven with her & tried to avoid the conversation he knew was going to happen.  
  
"No, I've finished", he moved his knife & fork together & placed them over his half-eaten scrambled eggs. B'Elanna took no notice & sat down opposite him "Oh please, join me" he said sarcastically. He started to eat again.  
  
B'Elanna took a minute to observe Chakotay, truth be told, although he was good at sorting out her emotions, she was reasonably sure she wasn't any good at sorting out his, but she had to give it a try. "So why were you in sickbay? The Doctor wouldn't tell anyone."  
  
"Now that's a surprise, The Doctor usually can't keep anything confidential to himself." Chakotay realised that The Doctor was keeping Seven's medical details to himself, he hadn't told the Captain anything, even when threatened. The Doctor must really care for Seven to risk the Captains' anger.  
  
B'Elanna tried again "Tom said that you were with Seven, that she nearly died & that you seemed fine. Harry said that you were both in the holodeck, running a programme that you'd designed, when there was an emergency transport. How did you & Seven get hurt?  
  
Chakotay tried counting to 10 in his head to control some of the anger he was feeling, it didn't work & he let loose. "Sadly, your husband gossiping is not a surprise but pass this on to him . . . If he can't respect medical confidentiality & understand that anything he learns in Sickbay should remain in Sickbay, then he has no business taking shifts in there and that is something that he & I will discuss at a later date. I will also have to have a long conversation about holodeck privacy with Ensign Kim. As for you B'Elanna, I would have thought that you'd have known me long enough to know that I won't add to the gossip on this ship, especially when the gossip is about me. Is that clear?"  
  
"Yes Sir."  
  
"Good." Chakotay snapped. He stood up carefully, so that his chair wouldn't overbalance & draw attention to them, although he wouldn't have minded jumping up so fast that his chair fell back and storming out of the Mess Hall. He was so angry, this was incredible they hadn't had their first 'official' date yet, they hadn't even kissed & already the vultures were circling, wanting any titbit of gossip they could get their greedy hands on.  
  
"Janeway to Commander Chakotay." He heard over the comm system, he signed internally again . . .round two coming up he thought to himself. He hit his comm badge and replied "Yes Captain?"  
  
"Please report to my Ready Room."  
  
"On my way Captain." He didn't want to leave B'Elanna like this; she needed to understand that he wouldn't tolerate any further invasion of his or Sevens' privacy. "Just to make this crystal clear B'Elanna, I know what skills & talents you have & I know how much working in Engineering means to you, so I need you to understand that I mean every word that I say. Should I learn that you have been invading my privacy, or Sevens', or that you helped anyone else to do so. I will make an official report to Tuvok, he will charge you & you will be court-marshalled, put on trial & sentenced to time in the brig after been stripped of your rank & busted down to Crewman. Do you understand me?  
  
"Yes Sir". B'Elanna watched as he recycled his tray through the replicator then left the room. She felt stunned, that had been worse than the time she had released Dreadnought & Chakotay had told her he'd been disappointed with her. Now he was furious with her, he must be to threaten her job like that. She slowly came to the realisation that she had been put on notice about finding out anything about Seven as well as Chakotay. Kahless! He must really care for her, if not love her, to try to protect her privacy as fiercely as he had . . .That meant Tom had been right & she hated that. But how was it that no one had seen this coming? Were she & Tom so self- absorbed that they had missed the signs? She didn't think so & that meant that there was still something she was missing . . .& she hated that as well.  
  
Chakotay entered the bridge from the turbolift, noted that Harry was at his Station, he considered going over & warning him of the consequences of not minding his own business but he knew he had to see the Captain first. He walked across the Bridge and pressed the chime, the door slid open, he took a deep breath & released it, then walked in.  
  
He noticed immediately that she was sitting on the couch and already had the tea out. That meant she wanted to 'chat' and they'd probably be there for some time. She looked up "How do you feel?"  
  
He sat down opposite her. "The same way I did after Ensign Chapman's bachelor party where there was a great deal of Romulan ale."  
  
"I'm guessing extremely hungover, you know there's a reason Romulan ale was made illegal Chakotay."  
  
"Yes I know & I wasn't drinking any yesterday either, no the day before yesterday, sorry, I'm having a hard time accepting that I slept through a day & a bit."  
  
"Okay. So why did you?"  
  
"Why did I what?" Chakotay tried to stall, he wasn't sure how much he could tell her without telling her about Seven or about him & Seven. Captain Janeway shot him a look that said talk or cease breathing. "Alright". He threw his arms into the surrender gesture. "I slept the day away because the Doctor gave me what he called a 'light sedative' so that my body and mind would be able to do some healing." He really hoped that would be enough.  
  
"What happened for you to need healing?"  
  
Nope, clearly not enough. Okay here we go again. "I was given some information which had me running the entire range of emotions & the Doctor believed that just ordering me to rest wouldn't be enough to get me to do it. The Doctor also wanted to keep an eye on me which, considering how long I slept, wasn't such a bad idea."  
  
"Chakotay, this is like pulling teeth, I still don't know what happened & I'm concerned now because it's not like you to be evasive & you have been. I haven't been able to get any information from the Doctor; I've had two crewmembers not to mention friends' unconscious for the last day & no one will tell me why. Now I'm the Captain & I can order you to tell me but I don't want to do that, so please tell me."  
  
She is good, Chakotay has no doubt about that, Katherine Janeway will use any & all levers she can reach to get her own way, but she wasn't going to get her own way this time. This knowledge had nothing to do with Voyager or its' safety only with Seven, it's her secret & only she can tell the Captain not him.  
  
"From your silence I'm going to assume that you want me to make it an order. All right, Commander Chakotay there was an incident in Holodeck 2 28 hours ago that resulted in The Doctor ordering an emergency transport to sickbay where Seven of Nine underwent an emergency procedure due to 1 of her implants malfunctioning & she is still unconscious. You were put on sick leave for 24 hours, which was later updated to 36 hours, for what the Doctor called 'Shock'. Now because you were running a programme of your own design & the Holodeck safeties were engaged I have to hold an inquiry to determine what happened & if there are any dangers to the ship or its' crew." Janeway spoke using a steely tone that was meant to convey to her First Officer that she wasn't messing around & she would learn what had happened.  
  
Chakotay knew this had gone too far but he couldn't see anyway to proceed, at least not without telling Katherine everything, unless he told her that he wouldn't tell her everything & that was probably the worst idea he'd had so far. He then considered the fact that the time he'd spent sleeping could have been put to much better use i.e. figuring out what he was going to tell the Captain.  
  
Okay, here goes nothing. "There is absolutely nothing wrong with the holodeck or my programme so there's no risk to the ship or the crew & if you look at the Holodeck log that will be verified. As for Sevens' implant, it didn't exactly malfunction because it was doing what it was supposed to, only it was doing that in a more human than Borg body which resulted in the malfunction & the need for the procedure." He really, desperately hoped that that was enough & that he had covered the Doctors misdirection so he wouldn't get into trouble.  
  
"That's not enough Chakotay, you see I did some research & I learnt that you didn't alert the Doctor, no one did, yet he knew to order an emergency transport. Would you like to explain that?"  
  
Truthfully, not really. Spirits how much did she know? & how much would he have to tell. "Seven was under the impression that the implant might be activated so she asked the Doctor to monitor her vital signs, he did, & when they showed her to be at risk he transported us both to Sickbay." He then realised that he'd really gone & done it with that last bit."  
  
"'Risk', what do you mean by 'risk'?" He knew that she now knew she was getting somewhere. It was now time to put his cards on the table, his but not Sevens'.  
  
"Seven told me about her implant & although she didn't ask me to keep the information from you I will. Had she wanted you to know she would have told you & frankly it's not my place to tell you."  
  
Captain Janeway considered this for a moment, Seven her protégé, her friend, hadn't come to her with something that put her at 'risk' yet she had told Chakotay, someone who hadn't wanted her aboard at first & had been slow to trust her. Why? "How much of a risk is the implant?"  
  
"I can't tell you. I'm sorry." He knew his tone of voice & his face told her he truly did regret that he couldn't. He knew that he really did want to tell the Captain just how risky the fail-safe device was so that she could order the doctor to disable it now, while Seven was unconscious, so she would be alright, as long as operation's a success. But he also knew that he had to give Seven the right to make her own choice, granted not much of a choice, but still a choice.  
  
"Why did she tell you & not me?"  
  
Chakotay knew the Captain was feeling a lot of pain from Sevens' decision because she allowed herself to ask that question. He also knew that he owed her nothing less than the truth. "Seven told me because she loves me & I love her." Chakotay heard her gasp but had to finish. "We told each other how we felt because we had reached the stage where we couldn't keep it from each other. I didn't mention anything to you because I wanted to know how she felt first & things just escalated very quickly." He shrugged wanting her understanding.  
  
She stood up & stared out of the viewport at the passing stars, she didn't have any right to feel upset. She was the one who had defined their relationship as friends only, she had said that as Captain she had to maintain a certain distance from the crew & she had done just that. Now that he had moved on she knew that she had been right to do so. But with Seven, she's a child; all right she has an adult body but emotionally. Yes she's exploring her humanity & part of being human is having emotions, but love? How could she know if what she felt was love or not & Katherine knew she would have to help Seven in any way she could.  
  
Chakotay tried to explain himself better. "Captain, Katherine, you & I know that maybe on New Earth we might have had a shot, but even there it wasn't completely right. When I'm around Seven it feels right, that's the best way I can describe it, I feel like a piece of me that I didn't know was missing has returned & it's her. That's all I know & frankly it's enough, if it's all I know for the rest of my life, it's enough." He couldn't go on, she still might die, & he knew that if she did he wouldn't want to go on without her.  
  
Janeway looked around & saw her friend trying to contain his emotions; she had always been able to read his face & what she saw reassured her. He truly did love Seven of Nine; now, all she had to do was discover if Seven of Nine loved Chakotay. Katherine hoped Seven really did love Chakotay or this could end in disaster for both of them. She walked around & hugged him. "It sounds as though you do love her & I'm happy for you, for you both."  
  
Chakotay heard the sincerity in her voice and found his after a few seconds "Thank you so much for that, it means a lot to me."  
  
She smiled affectionately at him. "Well, after that revelation I need something a little stronger than tea." She walked over to the replicator & said "Coffee, hot & black." She turned to face Chakotay "Would you like something?"  
  
"No thanks, I'm fine with tea." The replicator hummed, Janeway grasped hold of the mug & sat back down on the sofa. "I have to ask for some leave."  
  
"For how long?"  
  
"It might need to be as long as a week, maybe even more. Under Starfleets' relationship laws I wouldn't be allowed to be on duty unless it was a dire situation & the Captain & Second Officer were dead. But to be honest, right now I shouldn't be in Command as I doubt I would be able to keep my mind on my job."  
  
Katherine was curious "Why so long?"  
  
"I'm sorry Katherine, that falls under Sevens' Secret, hopefully it won't need to be that long." Chakotay was determined not to tell her about that. "I'm hoping that Seven will tell you herself."  
  
"Alright, request for leave is granted. Should I assume that Seven is on leave for the same amount of time?" The Captain was enjoying herself now.  
  
Chakotay considered that for a second or two, he didn't know whether the Doctor would allow her to work while she was on the medication or she may agree to have the surgery straight away & not need that much time to recover. "To be on the safe side yes, but the Doctor will probably have it down as medical leave & not requested leave, that way Seven can try to resist him & no one else." He grinned, Seven hated not been able to work, she had once deactivated the Doctor in the middle of a sentence just to leave Sickbay.  
  
"I'll wait for the Doctor to decide then." She also had witnessed Seven wanting to be free of Sickbay & didn't really want Seven arguing with her about it.  
  
Captain Janeway knew there was one more subject she needed to bring up, especially now she knew about Seven & Chakotay, but it was a delicate one. "When I was looking into what had happened on Holodeck 2 records indicated that someone had already gone looking for the information & the codes weren't Tuvoks'."  
  
Chakotay just sighed "Yes I know, Tom had to help the Doctor with the procedure & I clearly wasn't as discrete as I should have been as he told B'Elanna something, & possibly Harry. From what B'Elanna said he checked the Holodeck log, which he shouldn't have been able to do as that knowledge is restricted to Level 9 security, so I'm going to have to have a conversation with him. Now I threatened to have B'Elanna court-martialled if she used any of her skills to invade Sevens privacy or mine. I also told her to tell Tom that his job in Sickbay was on the line if he couldn't remember what he learnt in Sickbay was supposed to stay there."  
  
Janeway tried to imagine him talking to B'Elanna like that & couldn't, he must have been really angry. "Well you seem to have dealt with B'Elanna." If not wiped the floor with her. "If she cares about her husbands wellbeing I guess she'll warn him, so that just leaves Harry & as that's a security matter Tuvok can deal with him & change the access codes after he's learnt Harry's source. Then you won't have to think about what to say to him while you're on leave." She smiled, she had him there & she knew it.  
  
Chakotay just smiled back "Thank you."  
  
*"Sickbay to Commander Chakotay."*  
  
Chakotay hit his comm badge, his face betraying his fears "Chakotay here."  
  
*"Sleeping Beauty is showing signs of waking up, you'd better get down here."*  
  
"On my way." He closed the link & looked at his Captain & friend.  
  
"Go."  
  
He smiled at her then raced from the room. She sighed & went to the replicator for her next cup of coffee, she was sure she would need it. 


End file.
